I stopped being sad about you for various reasons. 1. It isn’t going to bring you back and I know that. 2. It only affects me, in no way it will negatively affect you. 3. You fucking left and I don’t want to miss people who leave me. If I don’t deserve their time they don’t deserve mine. 4. You fucking left. 5. You loved how spontaneous and full of life I was, and I am going to be that person again. If you see me I will be the person you fell in love with. 6. I want to be who I was before I met you. 7. Crying is only healthy to a certain degree, I don’t want to bring myself in more pain then necessary. 8. I’m starting to realize that I shouldn’t have forgiven you for all the bad things you did, things I didn’t notice because I was blinded with love. 9. You aren’t as perfect as you seemed. You are far from perfect and therefore you aren’t worth chasing. 10. I want to live for me and only me. I don’t want to live for you anymore, I am not your girl.
Category: Originals
1 YEAR!
We’re getting old, but we’re just getting started
I have absolutely loved to write on my little blog for the past year. In 365 days I have written over 240 posts and each of them hold a part of me. I have written made up scenarios, about falling in and out of love, of heartbreak and getting whole again. I have written about my own emotions, and how I often struggle with them. I have written about simple things that happened that day, about the emotions of others and what they have been through. The feedback and comments I get about my work is heartwarming. Theoverthinking.com has become my pride. Love, Josephine
– words
I’ve seen riverbeds and lake sunsets in your eyes.
It looks like someone caught the sunlight in your hair,
you move with the slightest effort.
And when you look back, and you glance, it seems like everything seems to stop for a brief moment.
What I’m trying to tell you is that beautiful wouldn’t suit you.
You have loved and been loved by god, and there are angels locked in your ribcage
– words I shouldn’t make public
Side
And you never asked me. You just told me to stay awake. And I hadn’t quite figured out why I had to, and why I did it. The day evolved into the rising morning in which we always embrace the dark. At midday, we had already met. I saw you in the corner of my eye, you were passing the hallways in such haste that you didn’t notice me. I watched the silhouette of what had to be you. And I watched the door open en close. I watched at the spot where you just went, and where you just disappeared. It meant entirely nothing, but I glanced into the hallway beside me. It occured to me that we never cross ways, we had never clashed into each others figure. We somehow always moved side by side, it could have been an inch, it could have been outside out comfort zone, but it never was close enough. It was save, risky and defiant.
It wouldnt be long before you were in sight again. But always alongsides, and never up front.
#63
Why would you give your heart to someone who already has trouble carrying her own? Why would you try to love someone who will never love herself less? Your were another field in the checkered world in which she crowned herself queen.
#62
I like my wine cold and my beers with a neat layer of foam. And I like my alcohol the way flows through my blood and relaxes every single nerve of my entire body.
I
I don’t know where I am going. I don’t know what I am trying to write. I know that I’m a mess and that my coffee isn’t warm anymore. My hair lost his golden glance and my body has disappeared in layers of comfort. The ridges of my hands are clean and my eyelashes are curled again. I recall myself walking head down through the school hallways yesterday. I never used to be that way.
I don’t know where I am going. I don’t know where I lost it. Maybe it was on that mountaintop, where I turned 360 degrees into the wild. Maybe it was that drunk night when I fell asleep in my own dream. Maybe it was that bright morning which made me feel extremely happy. Maybe it was that afternoon when I watched the sunset without blinking. Maybe it was that day that I lost myself in all astonishment about life.
I don’t know where I am going. I feel like standing in the middle of a busy trainstation. People flashing left and right. People I haven’t met and people I might have met. And they might have a destination, some may not. We’re all trying to follow our heart. We’re all doubting which train to take and were to stop. Which is a metaphor for life, you never know where to start, and where to end.
I don’t know where I am going.
As long as I move forward.
The overthinking 