I’ve seen Milan, I’ve visted Paris, I graduated and I turned 18. But some nights my mind drifts and shifts and I can only think about the way your lips felt. That tiny little detail in this ever growing world.
Category: Originals
I still think about it.
We were good together, you know it. We were a couple where it was so obvious that we had so much love for eachother. I hope you haven’t erased all the memories yet, I won’t blame you. I know I gave you a though time when I wanted it to end. I know that I ruined the time we had. I know. It’s still hurting me. But dear god we had some good times. Living by your side was a gift from heaven and I’m still grateful for that. I hope we’ll see eachother sometime. And we’ll smile, cause you know we were good together.
28th of July
It rained. It rained the entire day and the entire evening. I’ve spent the last two weeks fighting against the warmth outside, it had been sunny the whole time.
I’m sitting on the front porch listening how the rain pours and how the sky trembles. I’m baring my knees against the cold and my heart beats slow. There isn’t anybody out on the streets tonight, the light are dimmed. I’ve been waiting for this moment. To sit on the front porch and to be silent. I’m processing the grief of this day and how I still haven’t forgotten about her. At this point I don’t believe I ever will. The thought about her still makes me sad and still makes me want to cry. But I didn’t cry and I wasn’t sad. I sat listening to the rain in ease, in silence. She chose not to be here. It hurts, but just a little. It hurts until it doesn’t.
It rained.
Proud.
I made it. I didn’t think I would. Nobody was sure that I would make it.
It was dark outside but there weren’t much lights burning inside as well. The day had passed and everybody popped their champange and ate their celebration dinners. And then there was only me left with mixed emotions. I had cried happy tears when I heard the news, that I graduated against all expectations. I was relieved and overwhelmed that everything I didn’t dare to dream of became reality. The one thing I fought for beyond all of my breaking points. All the unfortunate events and disadvantages lead up this very point where I had to make it right. I had to do it, not only for myself but for my family. For my dear grandfather who believed I could achieve everything I ever wanted. For my dear grandfather who was applauding and back petting when necessary. All I ever wanted was to make him proud.
I made it. I didn’t think I would. Nobody was sure that I would make it. He did. He always kept faith in me.
Days like these
It hurts to live without her but you got to do it. You have to wake up every morning and start breathing. Open the doors, brew coffee and be grateful. Realize what you have and have accomplished and what is left undiscovered. Sympathize with your siblings and stop fighting your parents over five dollars. Set yourself free, get out of the house and get lost, wonder. Feed your tiny little heart with beauty and surround yourself with your loved ones. We got once chance and we blew it. Own it, make up for lost time and find peace. Live and feel and breathe the morning air. Start again. Rise again. – things I should have told myself three months ago.
#86
Breathe. Look around. This world isn’t turned against you.
Faster
‘Don’t panic’ I thought, as I rushed over the sidewalk onto the street, I ran, faster and faster, something was creeping upon me and I wanted to get rid of it, I wanted to escape the fear that hid in the rigdes of my shadow.
The overthinking 