Mensen geven om mij en ik heb liefde om te geven. Ik moet er aan gaan geloven dat ik het waard ben. Laat het gaan.
Wees niet bang om gelukkig te zijn.
22th of November
It doesn’t matter what we did, nobody noticed
Somebody had to do it.
I admire you for trying but please let me out.
Do not let me hold on to you.
I may have smiled a little to much when you showed me affection.
I realize that, -but I don’t want any of it.
#90
Is this love? Do I want to be needed?
I was yours before you ever were mine.
Why does it ache.
You remind me of everything I once had. A boy at my side with the best smile, who had loads of charisma and character. Somebody with goals and dreams and desires and a willpower to reach them. That was you. That was him. That was the boy that once belonged to my side.
It scares me to think I’ll never get the chance to take that spot. Coincidence made us cross paths but we’re not going parallel. We’re to young not to choose our own paths. Your world is drifting from mine and I don’t want to lose you out of sight.
It is not that I love you, but I could. I have so much love to give. We could make it in a different world at a different time. For now I get to see you smile and that is enough. I’m gratefull for the time we spent together, learning, growing, laughing and loving.
It is not that I love you, but I could
9th of November
Stop spilling
dirty rumours
and nasty secrets
over your bare hands
Let your pale fingers
be innocent
and unwarned
of that misery
Unfold your fists
to open up for
a new start
of only holding
the hands that
belong to you
Vacacion.
To me, vacations were a way of escaping my hometown, my work, my struggles. Only when I crossed the border I could smile a bit more. At this moment, it doesn’t change anything. I can be happy at home and happy across the border. Home is where te heart is, and sometimes a bit more sunshine.
03:30
An ordinary sunday, – we had to much to talk about and forgot the time.
‘Is she asleep?’
‘Yes, I guess, it is way past bedtime. You can go I’m just going to stay here for another while. I will put her to bed, it’s fine, don’t worry’
An ordinary mondaymorning, – I found myself in his bed, his hand on my shoulder, the one that untied my shoes and carryied me to bed.
give love and recieve kindness
The overthinking 